Families of New Flyers

The beginning of your child's university career can be a stressful experience, especially if this is their first time living away from home. During this important time of transition for the family, many parents put their own feelings and reactions on hold while helping their child prepare for college life.

However, attending to your emotional needs will go a long way toward helping everyone feel comfortable with the challenges that often accompany a transition to college. Planning for potential stress or anxiety will help you model stress management skills for your child and ensure that you are taking care of yourself!

points to consider

Recognize that feeling ambivalent about your child leaving home is normal.
On the one hand, parents often feel fear and concern about their child beginning a new phase of life with greater responsibility and independence. On the other hand, it is also normal to look forward to the relative peace and quiet of having your older adolescent away from home and having the place to yourself, or being able to spend more time with your younger children.

Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions arise.
No one is helped if you pretend not to feel sad, guilty, relieved, apprehensive or a whole host of other feelings, as your child prepares to start college. A healthier approach is to talk about how you are feeling — with your family, friends, clergy or whoever is a source of support for you.

Many college students enter their freshman year with high expectations. College is exciting! However, feeling stressed and even overwhelmed as you adjust to college life is also normal. This is a huge life adjustment with so many changes — new freedoms, routines, and responsibilities. And more than this, students increasingly are entering college with mental health issues that are more difficult than those reported by freshmen in past generations. While the reason for this is not yet clear, it may be because improvements in mental health treatment have enabled more students to thrive in spite of mental health concerns.

Expecting and planning for some challenges can help ease your transition to college. This is particularly important if you have struggled in the past with mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. However, anyone may find that they need a bit of extra support at any point during the college experience.

Tips and resources for navigating the transition to college

Know That Adjustment Is Normal.
It is normal for students to have mixed feelings about college approaching so quickly. Feeling excitement one day and anxiety (or even dread!) another day is quite normal. Even after you arrive on campus, you may need some support and guidance. Arranging regular calls, texts, or video chats with family or friends at home can help ease the transition, and know that it is also common for the frequency of contact to change over time.

Learn How to Foster Self-Reliance
It can take time to learn how to navigate living with greater independence. Be gentle on yourself as you learn how to motivate yourself, take personal responsibility for classes, and practice quality self-care. Here are a few tips:

• Establishing a regular routine is essential to limit stress. If you did not plan your schedule during high school, now is the time to try out a written planner, Google calendar, a scheduling app, or even a written to-do list!
• The general rule of thumb is that each hour you spend in class may require 2-3 hours of study time outside class.
• If you’re struggling, it is more effective to seek help (e.g., study groups, tutoring, meeting with your instructor or teaching assistant) earlier rather than later!
• Many learning resources are available to help you reach your academic goals.

Get Involved
If you find yourself struggling with homesickness, getting involved can help smooth your transition to campus life. Seek out informal opportunities (study groups, sharing meals with fellow students), participate in residence hall activities and embrace the discomfort of getting to know an entirely new group of people. The 1850 platform at UD offers many opportunities for involvement: from retreats to student organizations.

Seek Support on Campus
UD offers many formal and informal support networks to help students cope with stress and any difficulties adjusting to college life. Feel free to seek support from:

• Resident assistants, area coordinators and other residential life staff
• Members of Campus Ministry
• Academic advisors, faculty, tutors and teaching assistants
• Dean of Students office (can help with a wide range of concerns, including basic needs)
• Office of Learning Resources (accommodations and other resources)
• Counseling Center staff

College is an exciting time full of opportunities and challenges. With the right support, every student can have a successful college career full of growth and learning!

Our team recommends the following books to help navigate the college transition:

• College Ready 2021: Expert Advice for Parents to Simplify the College Transition by Dr. Chelsea Petree and Dr. Kristin Austin
• How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success by Julie Lythcott-Haims
• Secrets of a Financial Aid Pro: Master the College Funding Process and Give Your Child Lifelong Financial Skills Without Losing Your Cool by Jodi Okun
• The Naked Roommate: For Parents Only by Harlan Cohen
• How to College: What to Know Before You Go (and When You're There) by Andrea Malkin Brenner and Lara Home Schwartz

• Academic Calendar
• Advising
• Experiential Learning
• Honors Program
• Learning Resources

• Campus Recreation
• Dining
• Faith and Worship
• Health and Wellbeing
• Housing
• Safety
• Student Involvement

• Career Services
• FlyerCard (Student ID)
• Parking
• Safety
• Tuition, Aid and Billing