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By Patricia Wynn Brown

“I have seen your future and I am it." 
— Erma Bombeck, March 18, 1988, to students at the Harvard Law Forum

I am a Baby Boomer, and I have written a memoir. Instead of dismissing what I have to say with “OK boomer!” I believe all readers will discover hope and determination, and a laugh or two, on its pages.

In writing my memoir about growing up in the post-WWII era of the 1950s and 1960s with a severely mentally ill PTSD Navy vet Dad who died a headline-grabbing death in 1980 after being consumed by horrific flashbacks, I take the reader into our chaotic home and out the backdoor to a new life of peace and contentment. I discovered that, in life, everything is possible, even redemption and reconciliation with a troubling childhood.

When I started writing Royal Roots four years ago, I didn’t realize all the steps and the assistance I would need. In the spirit of helping other writers think through memoir writing, I’ve compiled some resources I relied on, the skills I’ve honed and the lessons learned:

RESEARCH: Through the Freedom of Information Act I finally uncovered what happened to Dad during the war. That led me to the Navy base and the site of an explosion that forever changed my Dad’s life. The visit culminated in a special recognition from the Naval base commander, who awarded my family a commander’s coin, an honor symbolizing membership, camaraderie and belonging.

Even though a memoir is deeply personal and subjective, writers should conduct research to provide context and accuracy around events.

HISTORICAL BACKDROP: Other than having the best soundtrack of any generation (OK boomer!), we lived through deeply meaningful historical events and pop culture moments: the assassinations of the Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. and the Kennedys (I saw both John and Bobby speak in person), The Beatles on “The Ed Sullivan Show,” Woodstock, the Manson murders and Kent State, to mention a few.

For any memoir, it’s important to set the backdrop of the times and frame your life experience in stories. And humor helps.

FAMILY DYNAMICS: Anyone who writes about their family knows it’s a high-wire act. When musician/actor Steve Van Zandt posted on social media about his new memoir, I asked him for advice. He posted back, “Tell the truth…as much as you can.”

That’s the Golden Rule in writing a memoir. It must be honest and authentic, even if it’s painful to write.

REVISION: Hemingway said writing is revision. I revised my manuscript repeatedly over the four years. I had the assist of a narrative specialist, Liz Hopkin. She kept guiding me toward the actual story like a star over Bethlehem. After the story was in place, she became my eagle-eyed editor.

I recommend hiring an editor to help you with clarity, structure and voice.

DEPORTMENT: I went to Catholic School as a child and the nuns were big on “deportment” — how we present ourselves to others. Not everyone who attended parochial school sees their teaching nuns as lifelines. I did. They hold a place in my telling.

During the first round of developing my book, it lacked deportment. It did not look good at all, including the cover and the layout. In came the cavalry in the form of Sara T. Sauers, a freelance book designer for the University of Iowa. She wrangled that cover and design into a thing of beauty. My dad garners a photo credit for the cover posthumously.

If you want your book to look professional, seek out a professional to help you.

PUBLICITY: Even beyond my multitude of potential customers in relatives, friends and neighbors, all writers need to learn the ways of social media and use it regularly to help sell their book. It is an essential ingredient in marketing a book. I will also be scheduling talks and making myself available to book clubs for conversations.

An author of these times has to tell the story on the page and to the public.

Yes, mine is a Baby Boomer tale, but it is a universal story as well — about overcoming trauma and shame, and realizing dreams. Today, there still are “children of war,” with parents coming home from battles abroad, and this story will resonate with a new generation.

As the kids have been saying recently on Tik Tok, “in da clurb, we all be fam.” We’re all family and share a universal bond across generations.

— Patricia Wynn Brown

Patricia Wynn Brown is the author of Royal Roots: Reimagining a Life Through Humor, a Castle and the U.S. Navy (Biblio Publishing). She's an award-winning writer, national speaker, performer, dancer and former longtime emcee of the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop, where she continues to help plan the event. Her humor memoir column appeared in newspapers for eight years. For 15 years, she performed her comedy memoir show across the country. As a former Catholic schoolgirl, her favorite color is plaid. Patricia considers humor to be the eighth sacrament of healing. A beloved comment she hears often from readers and audience members is, “I needed that laugh more than you’ll ever know.”