Skip to main content

Blogs

Watt the heck happened?

Judy Clarke"The bulb broke off in the socket and you can't get it out," said the wizened helper at our local True Value hardware store. I'd walked in holding the socket and the broken remains of a three-way bulb aloft in a plastic baggie.

"Well, yes," I said, "but that's not the problem." He was already heading to the front desk to get a screwdriver. Quick as a bulb burning out, he had the shards removed. "What happened is, I put in a new bulb, after the bulb I'd just replaced two days ago burned out. When I screwed the newest bulb in, it flashed, then exploded. Glass sprayed all over. It looked like fireworks."

He stroked his chin. No place but in a local hardware store would a clerk stroke his chin. Nor for that matter, help without being asked. I love local shops.

The solution was, buy a new socket assembly. I bought that and a bag of the peppermints I can only find at Christmas. The guys at the counter laughed at me. "Well-l, I didn't really come in here to buy candy," I said, attempting to make excuses for myself.

The next day I decided I could replace that socket myself. I consulted our 1975 edition of How things work in your home and what to do when they don't. Can't beat its concise directions and easy-to-understand drawings. I attached the twisty little copper wires onto one thingie, then the other twisty copper wires to the other thingie. Put in a new bulb, and POW. Three in two days. I was running out of bulbs. I called son-in-law Martin. He and Les were on their way out - they'd stop by in a few minutes.

When I showed him how carefully I'd followed the book's instructions, he looked at me with a grin teetering on the edge of laughter. "That's not the ground," he said, "this is. You shorted it out." I mistakenly wrapped one of the copper twizzlies around the switch instead of the terminal. Not good.

Within seconds he'd done it properly. Helpful sons-in-law are as good to have as a helpful hardware man. We have another good son-in-law in Bill, but he lives too far away for these drive-by fix-its I seem to need more and more often these days.

- Judy Clarke

Judy Clarke is a wife, mother of two daughters, grandmother to two grown grandchildren, reader, writer and blogger in southwest Virginia. Her two non-fiction books, Mother Tough Wrote the Book and That's all she wrote, can be found on her friends' and family's shelves, and she's working on a novel, But why? (That's the title of the novel, not a question to self). She's currently a finalist in the National Society of Newspaper Columnists' 2016 writing competition (in the category of online, blog, multimedia under 100,000 unique visitors).

Previous Post

Poppie's French connection

Of all the Romance languages, the most beautiful, in my humble opinion, is Pig Latin. Take this simple phrase: "Hiya, toots!" Translated into Pig Latin, it becomes: "Iya-hay, oots-tay!" Eloquent, isn't it? The second most beautiful Romance language is French, in which I am not, unfortunately, conversant. But I am learning it with a certain je ne sais quoi (translation: "Hiya, toots!") with the help of my 3-year-old granddaughter, Chloe. Chloe is learning French with the help of her ...
Read More
Next Post

Yes, this IS my real job

Ever since my memoir Ketchup is My Favorite Vegetable: A Family Grows Up With Autism was published, formerly pleasurable social gatherings feel like death by a thousand paper cuts. (Yes, that's the title. You don't like it? Oh, because tomatoes are a fruit, not a vegetable? Thanks, that's helpful.) Next question? A writer! What have you written that I've read? Beats me. What do you read? Can you make any money doing that? How's that lawyering thing working out for you? Is your book selli ...
Read More