Wrestlemania matches: The Norton Anthology of Literature edition : University of Dayton, Ohio

Saturday September 26, 2015

Wrestlemania matches: The Norton Anthology of Literature edition

(Editor's Note: This piece by Paul Lander originally appeared in the humor journal, The Higgs Weldon.)

Brett Hart Of Darkness Vs. Sgt. Slaughter House Five

Rowdy Roddy Pippa Longstockings Vs. Jimmy 'Lord Of The Superflies' Snooka

Kane Mutiny And Captain O' Captain Lou Albino Vs. The On The Road Warriors

The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter Hearst Hemsley Vs. Henderson The Rain King Kong Bundy

Norman Mauler And Jules Verne Gagne Vs. Pride And Prejudice: Jane And Stone Cold Steve Austen

To Killer Kowalski A Mockingbird Vs. A Portrait Of An Artist As A Young Mankind

George 'The Animal Farm' Orwell Vs. Tony Atlas Shrugged

Moby Dick Murdoch And Ivanhoe Koloff Vs. Blood And Gore: Flannery 'True Blood' O'Connor And Gore Vidal

- Paul Lander

Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of - winning the Nobel Peace Prize or sending Sudanese peace activist, Fatima Ahmed Ibrahim, to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of central Africa's indigenous people. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has worked as a writer and/or producer for shows on ABC, NBC, Showtime, The Disney Channel, ABC Family, VH1, LOGO and Lifetime. In addition, he's written standup material that's been performed on "Leno," "Letterman," "Conan" and "Last Comic Standing." His humor pieces have appeared in McSweeney's, The New Yorker, Santa Fe Writers Project Journal, Humor Times, The Higgs Weldon and Hobo Pancake. In 2015, he placed second in theNational Society of Newspaper Columnists' annual column contest in the online/blog/multimedia category for his pieces in Humor Times and was named the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop's "Humor Writer of the Month" in April.

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