Skip to main content

Blogs

Sincerefully

(Reposted by permission. Originally appeared on nationally syndicated humorist Tracy Beckerman's blog, Lost in Suburbia.

Dear Grammar Police,

I wanted to thank you publicly for noticing a grammatical error in my recent column ("Tracy Beckerman, Dis-Robed"), with regard to my use of the pronoun "I."

Apparently I had written, "the kids and I," when I should have said "the kids and me." This was a gross error of unparalleled magnitude and I apologize profusely for committing this miscarriage of syntax and offending your finely tuned grammatical sensibilities. I realize that as a writer, I should be well-schooled in the use of "I vs. Me," but it's (its?) often difficult to remember all the rules when I'm focused on much less important things like making sure my humor column is funny. There (Their? They're?) are so many rules to remember, (:? ;?) such as not ending a sentence with a preposition like another writer does who (whom? that?) I went to school with. Or a sentence fragment. And starting a sentence with a conjunction.

I'm sure my 3rd grade English teacher, Mrs. Kinsler, (may she rest in peace. Or is it piece?) would be appalled to know that I had not yet mastered the "I vs. Me" rule. She once sent a letter home to my parents and I (me and my parents?) about my ongoing problems with this rule, and one time she even sent me to the principal (principle??) because of it.

Shame on me that this is something I still have a problem with.

Sadly, as a writer in today's technological age, I have become lazy and prefer to spend my time lying (laying?) around eating bon bons and letting the computer's spell and grammar check do the work for me. This is a continual (continuous?) challenge for me and something I know I need to work on because it affects (effects?) my readers who (whom?) count on me to get it right (write? rite? Jeez.). I plan to address this forthwith (in a fortnight, actually, if I am being forthcoming), and assure you my editors and I (and me? Me and my editors? Whatever!) will make every attempt to make sure this does not happen again.

Thank you so much for your understanding. You sound like someone I could really be friends with.

Sincerely, or most sincerely, but definitely not sincerefully,

Tracy Beckerman

- Tracy Beckerman, part of the EBWW faculty, writes the syndicated humor column "Lost in Suburbia," which is carried by more than 400 newspapers nationally. Combined with her blog by the same name, "Lost in Suburbia" reaches up to 10 million readers weekly. She wrote the book Rebel without a Minivan: Observations on Life in the 'Burbs. Her next book, Lost in Suburbia: A Momoir. How I Got Pregnant, Lost Myself, and Got My Cool Back in the New Jersey Suburbs, will be published next spring.

Previous Post

Fifty shades of flannel

(This parody of Fifty Shades of Grey is reposted by permission. It originally appeared on FanFiction.net and sparked interest from Entertainment Weekly as an editor's pick, Today.com, ABC News and the Associated Press.) "Damn you Lanz nightgown," I think as I fall into the office of Christian Grey who is the mind-reeling combination of former crack baby, Adonis, billionaire, public university graduate and financial savant. How did I arrive in the spacious and austere offices of ...
Read More
Next Post

Erma nailed it

The greatest thrill of having been honored "The 2010 Erma Bombeck Global Humor Winner" is being blessed by the association with Erma and her lasting legacy of laughter. From California to New York and especially everywhere in between, I am frequently struck by Erma's enduring popularity spanning several generations. Her books not only live on, they rock! Recently in Studio City, Calif., while having my corns buffed and my cuticles pruned, I overheard salon buddies Anna and Rita swapping l ...
Read More